Deleted Scenes

by Lilly Wolf

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released September 16, 2015



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Lilly Wolf New York, New York

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Track Name: Promises and Plans
I want to run away with you
I want to hold your hand
And point at things like pretty flowers
And make promises and plans
Talk ourselves into an avenue and drive each other mad
Until it’s gone

How long til it’s gone
How long til it’s gone

We talk big
We get bitter
We wear our misery on our sleeves
We love hard
Kill each other
We do it recklessly

They’re tying loops around their ankles to their flickering TVs
I see their lackluster religions and their neighborhood intrigues
And all the air-conditioned loneliness inside the SUVs
Until it’s gone
Track Name: Wasteland
My head’s a wasteland, a library of names
Open books without words, open graves
I feel the days slip, not one remains
Nothing waits for me here, nothing stays

I stood with you and watched the snow
And the whiting out
I know that I can’t stop the time
I have an entry for the days
But no letters on the page
Just a date and a name

We saw the cars pass, diamonds in the night
And your ribs left their heat against mine
My head’s a killer, it’s coming for me too
I don’t know how to hold on to you
Track Name: Terrible Mistake
When it started out it was nothing at all
You were kind of startling
Angled and withdrawn.
Looking for a map of the world or a song
I don’t know

Suddenly I’m losing my head in a rush
Everything is highly defined and I’m fucking up
You can see me running alone in the street
Will you though

I can see the bright lights glowing
The alarm starts going
And I think I’ve made a terrible mistake
But we’re all dying anyway
Even if it kills me
Even if I don’t recover
I would rather be killed by a lover
I can see the bright lights

Something isn’t working I can’t find the words
Summertime adrenaline left me an afterburn
Looking for a map of the world or a song
I don’t know

Swimming in and out of a chemical sleep
Doubled over trying to drown in my bed sheets
You can see me running alone in the street
Will you though

Someday when you see me
I’ll be remote controlled
Call my name
I’ll wave and say hello
Track Name: Witness
You wanted everything perfect
You tried to make it work and it did
I was there to be witness to the moments
Lined up like post-it notes in the fine print

I tried to keep you on the line
The phone rang, the middle of the night
Sleepless and terrified
In my invisible vigil at your bedside

You say that now you’re an actor
Playing a doctor but you’re darker inside
Trying to mend these delicate bones
Negotiating with yourself at the same time

And we lose
The moment here
To our past and future fears
Track Name: Pop Dream
I can float
Like devastation
I can vanish in the weeds
Leave the broad constellations
For the endless underseas

Roses in the graveyard, roses in the garden
Scattered in the black
Deleted scenes
I've been writing pages no one ever reads
Pop dreams

I've been writing pop dreams

I can speak to the silence
Play a singular refrain
And I pull back the curtain
But the view remains the same
Track Name: Moving Pictures
I’m in the white heat
Out on the concrete
Knees to the pavement I spit
I’m making reds and blues
Run in violet hues
And I’m dizzy from it

I’m coming upturned
Like a ruptured balloon
You’ll see me blinking with my insides removed

I could be the one making diamonds out of blood
Cutting my lip
I could be the one with the paper on my tongue
I’m dizzy from it

All these moving pictures making me sick
I get dizzy I get dizzy from it

I’m in the main arcade the electric lane
And it’s painfully bright
Lit and luminous
Bleeding ruinous
Noise and poisonous light

I held a map up in my hands
It bled and all the colors ran
I saw the symbols and the words
But when I blinked the colors blurred
I could be the one
I could be the one
Track Name: Little Bones
Every day looks like each other
Draw the curtains
Deep cover
Egg yolks and orange rinds
Red fruit with miniature spines
Little bones are in my dreams
Masked men with skeleton keys
And able bodies

Who cradles my insides
Hearts beat and the organs will grind
I go to meet the sea
Ships land on distant shores
What are they calling me for
How can they carry me

I’m a dark and angry daughter
Rolling under warm water
Old hulls are in the brine
Lying in silent decline
I’m alone in afternoons
Weighted down by soft tissues
Who do they lean to
Track Name: Burn With You
You were in the dark you were cursing at something
I was on the floor staring up at nothing
You were in the car with the headlights glowing
Where are you going
Where are you going

Dead end
What do we do
The sound is out I’m on mute
Dead end
What do we say
With all the words the wrong way
All I wanna do
All I wanna do
Is burn burn burn burn burn with you
All I wanna do
All I wanna do
Is burn burn burn burn burn

I was in the dark when you caught me like a reflex
Back to the wall hands on my neck I think
I could be a ghost in the headlights glowing
Where are you going
Where are you going
Track Name: Nerves
I used to be so logical but now all my nerves
Are overheated lighting fireworks my head is submerged
In some demented disco carnival I know it’s absurd
I heard people are a little bit concerned

I don’t wanna be cured
I don’t feel sick
It’s only nerves
Don’t want to quiet my brain
I want everybody else to be insane

I used to be methodical and ordered inside
But now the screaming electricity has damaged my mind
And all the doctors and the nurses and the sanity meds
Can’t stop any of the crazy in my head

I’ve got a lot of pills for psychotropic pain
They look so pretty when they’re circling the drain
Track Name: Violence
I met a man who punched a wall
And riding on the train
I said what makes you simmer makes you burn
What makes you get this way he said
I just had a moment,
I saw my love turn red
Now I don’t remember where I went
Or anything I said

I can feel my insides wrenching
I can hear the buzz
I can feel a steady pulsing in my eardrums

Cause I’m a quiet kind of violent
In a city where the cold gets into everyone eventually
I just want to tell you you’re extraordinary
Then throw glassware make it rain on everybody

Some violence is obvious
But mine is on my tongue
I feel it like a frequency
A twitching in my blood
I want to be a frantic thing
A flashing in the dark
A desperado dying
With a bullet to my heart

I just want to
I just want to
I just want to
Make it rain on everybody